The End of My Vision Quest (and some updates)
2021 is the craziest year for me. Crazy in a good sense.
I love moments of awakening.
I love moments of getting real deep into my soul, experiencing hurt, confusion, feelings of giving up, fear, and guilt, and then watching myself being pulled out of the experience to experience clarity and effortlessness.
Along the way towards the end of my Vision Quest, I was guided to reconnect with people. I got back my phone and started reconnecting with people. I met a few souls who are clearly sent to me to support me in my quest for expansion. I gained a lot of beautiful and mesmerising realities of life.
I’d like to share one revelation I got during my VQ: Soul Walk-In
Let me begin with a background story:
Some of you who have been with me would know how I had been having trouble with my birth name. The feeling of having the wrong name had been there for decades since I was very young.
It got worse after 2013. The feeling was like being forced to be someone you are not.
Fast forward to this year (2021), during my VQ, I gained clarity about what’s happening. I consulted the people I trust, my soul sister, my go-to spiritual astrologer, and my teacher. I did some reading and researching on it too.
The clarity I gained was about why my relationship with my name got worse no matter how much I try to let go and connect with it with love; why I felt I needed to move into the next phase of my life — and knowing I can — but I couldn’t.
The answer was my soul contract.
In 2013, I had a bizarre, brief pregnancy and miscarriage. There was no baby found in the womb but I had a miscarriage. On the night when I was about to go through the surgical procedure at the hospital, I asked to use the toilet. That was when all the ‘strange’ things happened.
As I peed, I felt relieved after a surge of blood flowed out of me. It was a very peaceful moment.
I then had a blackout, and soon found myself in a totally dark place. It felt vast and empty as if I was floating nowhere. I heard a few “people” talking in a language I didn’t understand, but I got a clear sense of one of the things they said: “She isn’t supposed to die yet”.
In the next moment, I was flying around the toilet ceiling and down into my body. I opened my eyes and found myself on the floor beneath the sink, in a fetal position. My head hurt and as I just realised I passed out, I pulled the string to call the nurse and unlocked the toilet the door before I passed out again.
When I opened my eyes again, I saw people gathered around me, holding me up while a nurse kept on calling my name and sprinkling water on my face. As I was watching her, my soul entered my body causing it to jerk with a loud inhale. My eyes opened wide and I was panting. There was a moment of silence and shock; they were all looking at me before a nurse asked me if I was okay. I felt wonderfully well and full of energy. It also felt like I just came back from a long run.
It was during my VQ that I finally could make total sense of this. What happened in the hospital was a near-death experience that I had to go through in order for the soul swapping aka soul walk-in event to take place.
As they pushed me to the surgery room, I asked one of the nurses what actually happened to me and why were they all so shocked.
“We were trying to open the locked door because you were not answering. Then the door was unlocked and when we opened it, you were sitting against the door with both your eyes opened and your lips blue. We thought you were dead!”
I have heard and read about soul walk-in as early as 2011. This information came to me from time to time but I never thought it was something that could happen to me. There are different types of soul walk-ins, and I recognised mine as soul braiding type. You can read about here.
From this revelation, it was clear why my given name didn’t sit well with my soul. I then intuitively tuned into the sound from my birth name that my soul resonates with the most. The sounds “ya”, “s” and “sh” are the only ones that I felt strongly. “Ya” has always been my name since I was a baby. I love being called with that sound. Alas, I’ve decided to go with Shaya. It sits well with my soul now.
The Next Call
My next call is not an easy one. I needed support from a few people in my life to keep me sane. :D
But overall it was an exciting journey and I know all these happened because of my intention. I wanted to know what really happens when you follow the rhythm of your soul instead of your mind, instead of following what the society, people, religion or governments think is right.
The journey for me has been and still will be about learning and experiencing all kinds of emotional and physical detachments, and taking actions to change our situation. We take actions to follow our soul’s calling, never to escape or run away from anyone or anything.
When I shared my experience with my soul sister who is also like a mother to me, she said this: “The one thing to stick with is your integrity, choices that give you the feeling of peace”. That’s true. There is no right or wrong choice. “Wrong” choice is merely a more adventurous journey of reaching the same destination. And you can only know that after going through it. Yet, it still matters not whether it is right or wrong. We each have our own unique journey, and thus it is not upon us to think what is right or wrong for ourselves or others.
My next call or I would say guidance I received out of my VQ is to totally put myself out there. There are souls out there who needs me but they do not know that I have what they need. My challenge is to reach out and this has been the greatest block in my life. But I’m heeding the call with gratitude and excitement. I have no idea how, but I’ll just move forward one step at a time.
This week, I’m giving a free session to demonstrate full-body scanning using intuitive dowsing and to explain how energy clearing works. Head on to my website to learn more about the events. If you are subscribed to my email list, expect an email invitation from me soon. :-)
Thanks for reading!